Who of us doesn’t need encouragement? Something dies a little at a time when encouragement is needed but withheld. But, mentoring is more than encouragement. Webster defines a mentor as, “A trusted counselor or guide; a tutor, a coach.” A mentor loves, confronts, points out blind spots. In short, a mentor builds lives. Sometimes, mentors don’t come to you – you have to look for them. Here is some guidance to consider.
A mentor is trusted…don’t quickly select mentors. If you have some in mind, watch them for awhile. Are they consistent, steady, dependable and confidential? Can they be depended upon? Will they build you up or wear you down? As a mentor, be trustworthy at all times. Be wise with your words and actions. Live with high ideals and expectations. Step to the highest level. Treat others with dignity and respect. Think the best of them. Avoid critical judgments. After all, we never know everything about anything ever!
A mentor is a counselor and guide…listen to the counsel they provide in meetings or in the teachers’ lounge. Are they wise? Are they discerning? Do you consider their counsel and guidance based upon sound principles? As a mentor, be quick to hear and slow to speak. Learn to ask questions and guide others through the process of self-assessment. A good mentor is not one who has all the answers but must be a person who knows how to ask good questions.
A mentor is a tutor and coach…what do they know? What skills are their strengths? Are they matched to your needs? Do you feel motivated when you are around them? Are you willing to take their direction and confrontation? In other words, do you respect them enough to allow them to point out your blind spots? This assumes you must be willing to be mentored and coached.
A mentor builds lives! This is the bottom line. Mentoring is building up lives! Who of us does not need this person in our lives? Are you ready to be that person for someone else? If not, what’s holding you back?
I’ve discovered when individuals are gifted and young, the most common tendency is to fall into arrogance, and sometimes, raw conceit. Almost without exception when I detect conceit in an individual, I say to myself, They haven’t been mentored. I have never met a self-important individual who has been mentored. Truth be told, arrogance doesn’t survive mentoring. A mentor will point out blind-spots and will reprove you appropriately when you need to be confronted about your pride.
As a result of being mentored, you learn the value of being vulnerable, open, unguarded, honest, and ideally, a person of authenticity.
I welcome them. Why? Because I need them.
So do you.
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