Ours is a world that demands immediate gratification. From instant downloads to instant mashed potatoes, we want whatwe want when we want it . . . and that’s usually NOW! A mentor isn’t like that. He can’t be like that! He takes the long view toward those he mentors.
What does that look like in everyday terms? A mentor hangs in there. He has staying power. He isn’t restless. He doesn’t run. He isn’t a fair-weathered friend. He doesn’t give up when there’s criticism. That takes immense maturity in relationships with others. He strives to be patient with everyone and that’s no easy task.
Why is patience required? Because mentoring is a process because learning is a process. Who of us has not wished he could learn something more quickly? Often, real progress is a little at a time, step by step. And, sometimes, it is five steps forward, two backwards. The mentor that takes the long view realizes that what he has mastered may be extremely difficult for others. What is natural for others might not be for you. The important thing is that steady progress is being made and the process of learning is being enjoyed.
Taking the long view applies, regardless of the situation. That means a faculty member doesn’t step down because there’s difficulty in the school. A husband or wife doesn’t walk out because it gets rough. Does that mean that we never walk away? Not at all. But most of the time we head for the exit far too quickly.
As a mentor, you stick it out. You take the long view.
You might be facing a tough time right now. If you are, believe me, I understand. Schools can be brutal to its teachers. Everywhere I have been, I have encountered unexpected difficulties; and the reason I didn’t run? The memory of my mentors. They didn’t run either. Perhaps the greatest benefit that comes to those being mentored is that they cultivate perseverance. They too learn to take the long view.
Courtesy: Rosa Say
I suppose this is one of the reasons I enjoy plants; each day they grow a little more. Petals struggle to open, ferns patiently unfurl. They remind me to be patient with growth, both in myself and in others.
So, my counsel for you who are struggling with mentoring or being mentored is ” go through the process with great patience.” Celebrate every step forward, regardless how small it might be. And, when it seems that no progress is being made, hang in there! Take the long view!
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